Oh That Was Many Years Ago
by MrsMargeryLovett
Summary: Benjamin Barker did die. Now Sweeney Todd must take his place. He tried to gain Lucy's love, but the honourable Judge Turpin stepped in. Seeking revenge, can Sweeney avenge himself and the man he sentenced to death? Can he cope? Or is it too much?
1. To Have Loved And Lost

They didn't look at me too closely. If the Barkers did, they would find something so much different to the character with strange hair and pale features that looked too longingly at their happy life. They would find so much more. They would find a man capable of such deeds that it would change their lives.

My name was, and I suppose still is, Sweeney Todd. Times seemed to have changed drastically for me once I knew Lucy, and soon Benjamin Barker. I had been a simple enough man, and was well renowned despite my harsh features and matching temperament. Not that, of course, I could claim love at first sight to Lucy. No, I was not as pitiful as that. I had known her long before Benjamin Barker. I am proud to say I knew her even before she was as beautiful as she was the day she died.

I remember it well.

It was five years before she met Benjamin. She was still young. Fifteen, at the very most, if I recall. It sickened me how she had married so young. Twenty. That's all she was: twenty. I shudder to this very day. But my mind was set on that young Lucy. It would be complimentary to say she was not the most handsome of creatures at that age, but she was not by a long shot ugly. Her face still held perfect features, and her eyes still glowed. Yet her years of puberty left her slightly spotty, and with more weight than a working class girl. I still found her beautiful, though. I was a family friend at the time, and visited often. We became good friends, I suppose.

Not good enough.

At eighteen, her spots had disappeared and she was elegantly thin and blooming. She could have summoned men with a whistle if she wished, but no. I thought that after a few years of gaining her trust and friendship, I would have stood a chance. No one did. No one but Benjamin Barker, the young barber from down the lane. He was not a disagreeable lad, and I had no reason to hold a grudge against him. Of course, that was my previous thought. Now that my deepest desires had been stolen from me, there were certain resentments that could not be denied.

Lucy's family had at first thought that the friendship between me and Lucy was enough to become a foundation for marriage, and so they were as disappointed as I was at her declaration of their engagement. They found my brave façade chivalrous for a while, but then their attentions were turned to the young, handsome Benjamin. In my opinion, it was quite unfair. I was as young as Benjamin, and if I had been blessed with the same background as he had, I would have been as handsome. Yet fate wished to mock me in this way.

I could have easily shrugged off the events that lead to me losing Lucy. But my mind was a perturbing one. It disallowed such pleasures, and instead made me remember all too often. I sought comfort in a nearby pie shop which allowed me to wallow in self-pity. Mrs Lovett's Meat Pie Emporium. The food was ghastly there, and so no one came but me. Mrs Lovett herself did not notice me that well. Her attention was always directed upstairs.

Of course. The one place I could find solitude happened to be the shop below where my Lucy lived. I could not leave, though, as it was still that: my place of solitude. It was also a place of good observation. From where I sat, I watched as Benjamin Barker would visit the shop in a friendly manner, helping Mrs Lovett while her husband was gone drinking. I was not surprised to see that loving look every time she saw him. It was undeniable that she was indeed in love, and I felt a surge of anger. Benjamin Barker did not notice.

What sort of a man was he? Everything that he had- countless admirers, a beautiful wife, and a child on the way- was oblivious to him! Why, if I were in his position, I would have sang constantly! I would have shouted to the heavens every Sunday and praise the Lord for what He had given me. No, Benjamin Barker was not like that. He was simple enough to take what he could, and smile through the pleasures, mocking those below him. And for that, I hated him.

Fortunately, Mrs Lovett, although desperately in love and ignorant of me, kept me interested in sanity. When Lucy and Benjamin would leave their home for a trip to town, I would keep her company from a distance. In a way, I felt as if I were writing a story, and watching it unfold before me. I watched the drama as Albert Lovett would come back to the Pie Shop, and immediately leave to their small parlour to drink. I would watch Mrs Lovett drop a tear, and wince as she thought of the caring young man above her shop. I eventually watched as her jealousy grew when young Johanna was born to Lucy and Benjamin. I joined in her jealousy, although for completely separate reasons.

I longed to find Mrs Lovett's company, simply to express me feelings with a more understanding party, but found this impossible as her attitude was quite reluctant to anyone besides her own little building. My nights after this realisation were spent in a sighing fury, knowing that I should never find a companion for simple conversation. On these nights, I would look down at myself and imagine myself crying over the poor, pitiful creature who could not sleep, eat or properly breath under circumstances.

"Poor Sweeney Todd!" I would cry through the night. "Abandoned in the world by all those who knew and loved him!" Any other creature in my position would have thought of menacing evils. But no, I was more civil than that. For days on end I would sit at Mrs Lovett's Meat Pie Emporium, until about a year after baby Johanna was born. Finally, my restlessness was more than I could bear. A plot came to my mind, and quite a delicious one at that!

With the spark of the plot in my head, I rushed to my writing desk and whipped out my paper and ink. My hands trembled as I put the pen to parchment, and began to write.

_The most honourable Judge Turpin,_

_As a most law-abiding citizen, I find it strange to need your services in such a worrying haste, but a crime beyond all comparison has been committed in Fleet Street that I think requires your immediate attention._

_Not a day ago, I was walking down Fleet Street towards the famous Benjamin Barker's Barber Service. Dear Lord, I thought, as I looked down the street to see that same Benjamin Barker to be out by the road committing the most terrible of crimes. Theft! Theft, nonetheless, from a poor woman who I recall to be visiting her grandson. I could not stop him, for at that point the saw me and ran back into his shop. I had only enough time to help the poor lady back to her feet and send her on her way safely, but without the expenses she had left home with._

_This, I believe, requires you and your faithful beadle's service as soon as possible. There is one last thing I must ask of you._

_This Benjamin Barker is married to a young maiden by the name of Lucy Barker. I wish to make it clear that no letter should be mentioned to her, and no address is to be mentioned to her, lest her heart should break from it. My intentions are to comfort this young woman, and it would be quite impossible to do so if her heart is beyond repair._

_Enclosed is the address to Benjamin Barker's Barber Service, and I hope that you shall see to the business soon!_

_Your most faithful servant,_

_Anonymous._

_I signed the letter as such, afraid to find myself named in front of Lucy. Guilt overwhelmed me as I enveloped this letter that would send an innocent man- the man whom my true love had married- to the gallows or to some torturing prison far off. Yet, there was still something in my mind that made me feel as if everything I was doing was completely right. For the moment, I had to believe that it was._

_And exhilaration ran through me as I realised I was to send the letter. In fact, no. I required someone else to. I leant out of my window, watching out at Fleet Street. It was then I saw a young boy come from Benjamin Barker's Barber Service._

"_You there! Boy!" The young lad looked up at my window._

"_Yeh talkin' ter me, sir?"_

"_Yes, you! What is your name?"_

"_David, sir. David Connings, sir." I threw the letter down, watching it flutter to the ground slowly. The young David picked it up, and looked at me._

"_I want you to send that to Judge Turpin. Put it in his hand and no one else's. Can you do that for me?"_

"_Yeh, sir." He nodded, and ran off. I wondered for a moment why he had not asked for payment, but was quite glad he didn't. Due to Barker's barber business, I had not been able to gain a penny, despite being able to shave twice as well and much quieter to that. It was a dreadful shame._

_What was more of a shame was that Judge Turpin seemed to have held onto the letter longer than needed. The young boy did not come back, but I did not doubt that he had sent the letter. The Judge seemed to wish to irritate me._

_But not for long._

_I had merely waited a week._

_I was in St Dunstan's Market at the time._

_I had seen them._

_They had not seen the police._

_I smiled, prepared to place a friendly hand on Lucy's shoulder._

_The Judge got there first._


	2. And Never Come Back

Back at my small flat, overlooking Fleet Street, I rampaged. Not a single piece of paper was left unshredded, and not a single piece of furniture was left unturned. My anger held no limits. I was forced to keep my window fastened shut for the next week so as not to scream at passers by. Although, it would not have surprised me if I were heard anyway. I would roar furiously, randomly, and frighteningly. I wasted no time with sleep. I simply created havoc around me.

I was too successful.

The landlord came to me in a fortnight of my ravings, and gave me the week's notice. I was to be left on the streets. I would not have been in such a mess if I had not left such a lunatic impression on the people of London. I could have gained business easily. But now there was no hope for me.

And yet, this was an opportunity.

Looking out from my window, I had seen the Judge watching the old barber shop. Watching Lucy. That would always send me trembling with fury again. From the room I was sat in, I could usually look across straight into Lucy's window- not to mistake me for a pervert- and see the stricken look on her face as she watched the Judge below her window, holding flowers up as if he were an Adonis. I would bare my teeth, as if to snarl, but refrained from such. I was almost insane, but I was not an animal.

Each day the fear and loathing became more apparent from Lucy. The Judge seemed to become more and more eager because of this, and so remained oblivious to the fact he was not loved. It made me sick. Finally, my last day came, and I could no longer repress my need to see her.

Without haste, I grabbed my coat and made for the door. I did not bother locking it. I had no possessions to be stolen. Mrs Lovett did not notice me go by the pie shop, and instead kneaded the helplessly thick dough, weeping. It came as no surprise. She had also loved Benjamin. I wished to throw up knowing how much havoc he had caused in so many people's lives. It is hypocritical coming from me, I know, but without me doing such things I would not have realised how he could hurt so many helpless women. I went up the stairs towards Lucy, and knocked thrice.

"Who is it?" she asked shakily, obviously having been crying.

"It's Sweeney, Lucy."

"Sweeney!" Immediately, the door was opened, and there stood Lucy with her little Johanna tucked in her arms.

"Dear God, I have not seen you for such a long time! Where have you been?"

"Here and there." I did not wish to mention that I had only been down the street. She passed her free hand over her eyes, attempting to brush away tears that still stood boldly on her cheeks.

"Come, sit. You look positively weary." I tensed.

"Don't think of me at a time like this." She smiled sweetly at me. My guilt increased as I watched those full, pink lips part in such a beautiful smile, despite her sadness. Lucy paused my visitation for a few minutes as she put baby Johanna in her crib.

"Silly me," she said. "You're here as a guest, aren't you? I should ask if you wanted anything to drink."

"No, no, I'm alright. I'm here, actually, because of Benjamin." Her face turned stricken.

"You know?"

"Lucy, I'm afraid everyone this side of London knows." She moaned mournfully, and put her head in her hands. Her whole body shook, and I knew immediately that she was crying. I put an arm on her shoulder, comforting her as I had promised myself.

"I can't stand it," she wailed. "I must be a laughing stock!"

"No, anything but," I insisted, although I had not left my home long enough to know. Lucy looked up at me.

"Do you know what he was taken away for? They won't tell me."

"Theft," I said automatically. Too automatically. She cocked her head slightly. "Some say foolishness," I added. "Thinking he could get away with it."

"You do not think he did it, do you?"

"Well, I-"

"Sweeney!" She placed her hands on my shoulder firmly, attempting to look threatening. "He had not left my side at all since I fell pregnant with Johanna. The only time he would ever leave these walls would be with me at his side. He had not done anything." I nodded hastily, not wanting to anger her any further. She grimaced, and let me go, appearing all of a sudden at the window. She looked down, biting her lower lip.

"He's still there," she whispered softly.

"Judge Turpin?"

"He has not left me alone all week. I don't know what has gotten into him. I doubt he had ever heard of me before Benjamin left. I most certainly had never made his company." Another twinge of guilt. Had I just introduced the two, somehow? Lucy sighed, and turned her head to me.

"I'm boring you, I'm sure. I shouldn't speak of my own troubles while you are here."

"They don't bother me, Lucy. I've grown used to them over the years." She smiled truthfully for a moment. In that moment, I savoured it.

"That's right, isn't it? I do complain far too much, if I say so myself. But-" She paused, biting her lip again.

"But you always seem to listen, nonetheless, don't you?" I nodded, still not sure what to say. Lucy walked to my side, her eyes watery and wide.

"Why?"

"Why what, Lucy?"

"Why do you do it? Why would you listen to my pitiful ramblings?"

Because I love you! Because my innermost soul tells me to keep you within reach, lest I should die!

"I don't find them ramblings," was all I said. She didn't move, still staring at me.

"But they are." I could not help but chortle.

"Lucy, you hold not enough respect for yourself."

"You hold too much for me."

"That is definitely something I can not deny." She tilted her head, unsure whether to be glad of my response or repulsed. I was confused myself. Lucy then cleared her throat, slightly more awkward than she had been before.

"I think…you should really go. Before anyone sees I've allowed you here so soon after Benjamin's-"

"I hoped we could avoid his name at all costs."

"He's my husband."

"You're so sad, though."

"That can't be helped. I just have to wait until he comes back. That can only be another few days. They'll know he's innocent."

"Lucy…" There was no hope, and I knew it better than she did. Perhaps if I had not introduced the Judge and Lucy, there would be a chance. There were no witnesses, after all. But now…I shuddered to think. Just then, we were disturbed by a knock at the door. In her distressed moment, Lucy did not even bother to ask who it was, and instead called for the person to come in.

"Good day, my lady," said the beadle as he came in. I wrinkled my nose at his greasy look, but was thankfully not of enough importance to him to be noticed.

"May I help you?" asked Lucy.

"Perhaps not me, dear, but the Judge has sent me to pass on a message of some sorts. You see, he is very contrite about your unpleasant situation. He takes the whole thing upon his shoulders. Very repentant, as well. He wishes to see you at his home tonight, so as to sort these affairs out." He smiled greasily, and turned.

"I shall wait at your door tonight." Lucy was speechless until the beadle closed the door behind himself. Then she wrapped her arms around my neck and embraced me, squealing in delight.

"Did you hear that, Sweeney?! Oh, I shall have Benjamin back by midday tomorrow!"

"Yes," I said weakly, losing my voice.

"Isn't it wonderful?"

"Of course." I swallowed. Lucy did not notice my hesitant behaviour. She paused in the middle of her ramblings as she looked over at Johanna's crib.

"Oh, dear! Sweeney, my dear friend, you couldn't possibly look after Johanna for me tonight, could you? I would ask Mrs Lovett, but she has been weeping almost as much as I have nowadays! It must be Mr Lovett. His weight never kept him in the best health."

"Yes, yes, of course Lucy." She beamed at me.

"Thank you, my dear friend!" She embraced me again, holding me closely. I reciprocated, carefully and yet firmly holding her back. The embrace was only to last a moment, though, and she quickly wriggled from my grasp and span to her wardrobe.

"I must change! Sweeney, please, be back at six. I do not know when the beadle will come, and I do not want to be leaving Johanna by herself." I was in such a daze that I had not realised I was walking out the door. I snarled to myself when I realised it, but insisted on ignoring my instincts to turn back. I needed to pack. I had few possessions, but there were a few things that I needed to remember. My pictures of a younger Lucy. My diaries of those days. And a box of my finest razors. They had not been put to use for such a long time, and so were as perfect as when I had bought them. I sneered slightly.

Would he have ever had the guts to even think of holding such beauties?

I suppose he would. He had held Lucy, had he not?

I pondered this as I rocked Johanna to sleep, waiting for Lucy. The beadle was hasty in taking her away, and I was uneasy. Again, I was ignored, but was slightly glad of it. I did not want the Judge to hear of me in Lucy's home. No, indeed I didn't.

For a while, I concentrated on the small child in my arms. Strange, I thought, how she should feel so comfortable. Most found me a solitary character, but this young Johanna seemed quite at ease. It was enough to make me smile, and so I did. Johanna's arms flailed gleefully. She was so innocent, so pure, and so unaware, that it made me wish even more to cry. It made me wish that I were her father, not only because it would have meant making love to the one woman he wished to, but because he was there. It would be her father looking after her as Lucy left on business. It would be her father who was free from jail. I sighed, contemplating this.

My contemplations were cut short.

Only an hour after I had put Johanna to sleep, there came a hurried rush of footsteps. I looked casually at the door, waiting for Lucy to return, brightly excited to make her home perfect for the return of her husband.

No. Fate was not that kind.

The very first thing I saw from Lucy was her face hidden by her streaming yellow hair. Despite this, I knew she was crying. Her left arm was pinned to her right breast, and I could see that it was so as to keep the fabric of her now ripped dress over her skin to keep her decent. She was no longer wearing the necklace she had left with, and even the shining aura I usually found about her had disappeared.

"Lucy! What on earth has happened to you?"

She could not answer, and only sobbed.

"Listen to me, Lucy. You must tell me what-"

"Just go," she said quietly, shaking. I made my way towards her, a friendly arm extended.

"Let me just make sure you're settled, Lucy. I can't leave you in this state."

"Just go," she repeated, quiet and yet more firm. That told me well enough to leave. I nodded, and patted her shoulder lightly as I left. I sighed at the doorway, and then paused as I heard Lucy's voice again, quiet and grave. I left, not fully comprehending what she had just said. My anger began to swell. I knew what I had to do now. I made my way to the prison. Benjamin Barker would still be there, and I had to see him. I could not repress the fact any longer. Within the hour I arrived at the prison, searching down the dark hallway with prisoners either side of me clawing through their bars.

Then I saw him.

He was easy enough to distinguish, as he was the only one serene enough to not scream at me. I stood for a moment, watching him crouch in the corner as I waited at the bars of his door. I cleared my throat, making myself known. He immediately looked up, and his eyes widened gleefully.

"Mr Todd!" he cried, jumping to the gates to see me. "Mr Todd, I can not believe it! You must be the first to come here."

"Has Lucy not come?"

"No," he said quietly, but then he looked at me again with bright eyes. "So you're here to let me go, aren't you?" I swallowed, looking into his now quizzical eyes.

"Aren't you?"

"I'm afraid not."

"Mr Todd, please, there must be something you can do."

"There isn't, Benjamin."

"Mr Todd, my wife is waiting at home for me, and our child! You must be able to think of something!" I shook my head.

"No, Benjamin. Even if I wanted to, there is nothing I can do."

"Wanted to? I don't understand."

"You see, Benjamin, I don't want you out of here. You stole from me, Benjamin. The one thing I held dear and precious in this world is gone to me because of you."

"I still don't-"

"Lucy!" I screamed, unable to keep control. "You stole Lucy from me!"

"What does she have to do with-"

"I knew and loved her long before you did. Maybe if you had not seen her, it would be us with a child named Johanna instead of you."

"I meant no harm, sir, but we are-"

"In love? And I suppose you think that means much to me." Benjamin's eyes were wide with fear and realisation, and closed as he shook his head.

"No, Mr Todd." I sighed, pitying him slightly.

"Like I said, there is nothing I can do." That was not exactly true. There was nothing I could do for him. But there was something I could do for myself. I went to the courthouse, and applied for a job overseas where I knew Benjamin Barker was being sent to prison, all the while contemplating those last words I heard from Lucy's lips.

And please, whatever you do, don't come back.


	3. Make Sure She's Safe

I stayed unmoving throughout the duration of our journey to Australia. If I had dared look behind, I would think too much of her, and of those I had helped in forcing under the deck. Dear God, the faces of all those men. Benjamin didn't look me in the eye at all, but I knew from even the distance I was standing that he was crying. The tears of remorse running down his cheeks were enough to tell me I had done wrong, but I could not say that I wasn't glad I had shown him what an honest day's work was, all bundled into one. Guilt passed through my very veins, but I smiled at that thought.

"Prisoner's to the deck!" called one of the superior ranks I didn't even know the name of. I didn't want to know his name. I despised many of the vermin who were sent to Australia, but I even more disliked the man who treated them worse than he ought to have done. I and several other guards called upon the prisoners, who all lined up in their orders on the deck, shackled together. It was a terrible sight, but the power I felt from it enlightened me.

"Prisoner's to the docks!" They all marched out in line, not looking up, all looking tired and mournful. It was pitiful. I said not a word unless it was directly to my superiors, and instead surveyed the spectacle before me.

"Prisoner's to the walls!" This was shouted as we neared the prison. All were lined up against the stone walls, and those who refused were beaten to death in front of the rest. I saw it happen on three occasions, and each of the strikes with the weapon of the guard's choice made me shudder. Again, I saw the cruelty of man in all its glory.

"Prisoner's to the doors!" They were led towards the large, wooden doors that they would never see open again if the guards had their way. I saw that the prisoners were able to be split into two groups. Those that stayed without emotion, and stared forward as if facing a brave death. And then those who let their emotions get the better of them, crying like children with no self respect. It was simple enough to guess which Benjamin was in. Tears streamed down his eyes, due to the though of his Lucy, I should think. It made me sneer. I had lived a lifetime without even a gentle caress from her, and I did not allow it to make me cry. I became angry, but I didn't cry.

"Prisoner's to the walls!" Once again the prisoners were lined up against the walls, ordered into their rooms once at a time. Each of the guards, including me, had to take at least one prisoner to their room.

Benjamin Barker.

Fate, once again, seemed to concentrate on me.

I took him by the shackles that bound his wrists and had to drag him to his cell. The journey on the ship had made him weak, and alarmingly different. His usually clean shaven face was dirty and with signs of a thick five o'clock shadow. His clothes were ripped and frayed. His eyes were losing the brown shine that dear Lucy had fallen in love with. There were dark purple bruises around his eyes, emphasizing his fatigue. I thought thankfully how Lucy wasn't there to see him like this, and guilt was relieved from me knowing that once Benjamin had been thrown into his cell, I could leave him to cry and sleep in peace.

"Wake up's at five o'clock tomorrow," said one of the guards I did not know by name yet to me when I came from down the long corridor to our meeting quarters. "I want all of them up and ready for labour by five thirty."

"Yes, sir," I said with a nod. There was not much else to be said about that evening. All that can be said is the guards took pleasure in drinking and gambling through the night, as if our job took place in a brewery. They conversed about the most trivial and grotesque of things, such as the business they had left behind and the women that they wish they had brought with them. I could not relate at all. I had loved Lucy, and here I was listening to lustful men who were doomed to celibacy for the next few years.

And I was doomed to these men for the next few years.

It sickened me.

For the next few weeks, this was how life was lived. The time passed slowly, if at all, and by the first month I felt as if a year had gone by. After a certain amount of time, the year had felt like a decade. And so and so forth until I almost forgot how old I was, let alone how long I had been in the prison walls. The guards were almost as captive as the prisoners, although we were treated with more luxuries such as alcohol, and better quality food and clothing.

The one thing that kept me going, though, I must admit was him.

Benjamin Barker was surprisingly stronger than all the other prisoners that had come in with him. He had not been as hard hearted as some of them when he came, but soon he lost all sense of being and was an easily controlled robot who only required food and water twice a day at the most. I suspected he would die before the year was over, but even after five he was strong.

It gave me slight hope.

Yet, I wondered if behind his blank exterior, he remembered everything. If he remembered that I had sent him here. If he remembered that I hated him. If he remembered Lucy, and Johanna. The Judge. If he remembered his life back in London. If he even remembered his name. He wasn't called Benjamin Barker here; he was simply 'prisoner'. It was the same for most, but I was certain they at least called themselves by what they were known as in London. Not him. He didn't speak enough for that.

Before I knew it, fifteen years of my life had been wasted. Fifteen years in a hell hole, watching men waste away. Fifteen years waiting for him to waste away. I never succeeded, though. Even when I was the one sent to beat him because of any sins we may have thought he committed, I never did see him die.

Until it all became too much.

I was sent again to beat him, to try and steal that last bit of sanity that kept us from killing him. I watched him trembling without control on the floor- a simple reaction to the torture we put him through. His face twitched with every strike, but that was all. There was no whimpering, no screams, not a noise. My lip curled up, sneering at him.

"Why do you have to live so fiercely," I asked once I had finished. "Have to be so brave all the time, don't you?"

Not a word.

"It's nice to see you can do it now. You never did it back in London." That was when we first got a reaction from him. Benjamin's fists clenched, and he looked into my eyes.

"I didn't have this shit when I was in London." He glared at me, but I almost laughed.

"And finally, after so many, many years, we hear him at last."

"I only want to ask you something. Then I'll shut up, and I'll…" he trailed off, and swallowed. "I'll die."

That is what caught my interest.

"What did you say?"

"I'll die if you do something for me."

"What is it?"

"Promise me first."

"I can't promise what I don't know about."

"Then I shall tell you!" he cried passionately, though his weakness allowed him little volume. "All I want is for you to go back to London. If only for a week. I want you to make sure Lucy is safe. And Johanna."

"And tell you? Why would I bother?"

"You love her as much as I do, Mr Todd. Do not try and fool me. And you needn't tell me a thing. Just make sure that, if she isn't alright, that she will be. I don't care what you have to do. Marry her, if you must! I only want her to be safe."

These words were almost as painful as the weapon I held.

"You…you just want me there?"

"Mr Todd, there is no confusion in what I ask. Please, I beg of you, just do it. Tell her that I sent you. Tell her I still love her. Tell Johanna that I will always love her. Mr Todd, you must! I did not see my daughter grow up, and if she does not know that her father loved her then it shall make death all the more a distraught event!"

Poor man. How could I ever say my thoughts were certain that Johanna did not know of him. That Lucy would more than likely have re married. That they had moved on. And yet, as I looked into Benjamin's eyes, which showed the first sign of tears I had seen in years, I was moved. With a dry throat, I nodded.

"Oh, thank you Mr Todd! A thousand thank yous!" He wished to stand, but could not, and so I simply nodded again to keep him in place. Without another word, I left.

It was that night that he finally gave up.

He finally took his last breath.

He finally died.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N-** I kind of realised while browsing through my stories that I never fully finished this one. The chapter was actually written, and I was sure that I had uploaded it, but silly old me, it wasn't :D Hope you all enjoy the last chapter. And if you're new to the story, hope you enjoyed the rest of it!

Escaping from the prison was not the most pleasant of experiences a man could endure, even as a guard. There were not many men that would accept the job, and so to lose someone was impossible for the prison. Dogs were sent after me, and I was forced to jump over the walls if I wished to leave alive. The water was icy below the prison walls, and I immediately regretted my choice. But there was no choice. I would have to go back to London, if only to see Lucy one last time.

In this thought, I was lost to the world. I did not even realise that the weather was far too wild to be out in the water. The waves were high, and it was almost unfeasible to survive for much longer than an hour. Yet, somehow, I survived longer. I was thrown in the waves, drifting further and further from my 'sanctuary'. My limbs had lost feeling from the cold, and my head was spinning. Yet I would not allow myself to die. I would have to wait until London to do that.

Wait.

That was all I could do.

But soon enough, I no longer had to wait. When my limbs were dead and I had begun to show signs of frostbite, a large figure came through the mist of the sea.

A ship.

I groaned as I realised that fate would not allow me such salvation. No, that was not it. God would not give me such salvation. I closed my eyes, knowing that there was no hope left. Many of the Christians on that ship would sleep a peaceful night leaving me to die there, and I expected nothing less.

"Look!" called a young man on the ship. "It's a man! A man in the sea!"

"You three, to the lifeboat! Quickly!" There was up roaring noise, and a splash. Within a few minutes, I was vaguely aware of being pulled into a slightly warmer area, and being wrapped in a woollen blanket. Only another few minutes, and I was being dragged onto the deck. Another few boats were sent out, more than likely to check that I had not come from a ship wreck with valuables on.

"Can you hear me, sir?"

I groaned in response.

"The captain's just searching for your ship. Whereabouts are you heading to?"

I managed to mutter out the word 'London'. The young man chuckled.

"Small world. We're heading down there as well. Should only be a few more days, a week at the most." I nodded, wincing as I did so.

"Don't move, sir, seems like you had far too much a time doing that in the sea." Again, I felt myself being moved, and it was not long after that I was placed in some sort of a bed. It was hard, and not very warm, but it was a bed nonetheless. Not another word was said to me over the next twenty four hours as I gained back strength enough to roam my surroundings. In this time, I was able to think. To contemplate. My thoughts were soon angry.

After all this time, I had never thought to pin the blame on anyone.

It was no one's fault but mine that Benjamin Barker had been sent to prison.

It was no one's fault but mine that Lucy was left alone and abandoned.

It was no one's fault but mine that Johanna would grow without a father.

But…was it?

It was the Judge who relied on a simple letter to condemn a man to a life sentence.

It was the Judge who had tried to have his way with a woman soon after losing her husband.

It was the Judge who cared nothing for Johanna, leaving her fatherless.

Yes, it was all the Judge.

Rage consumed me, and soon overwhelmed me to the point where I was no longer a man, but a demon. I could only function through my anger, and could not comprehend any different way of living. No, there was no different way of living. The undeniable fact ran through me, and I couldn't stand it. As I walked onto the deck, no one looked in my direction. I was glad of it. If there had been someone to look at me, they would have noticed the difference. The eyes of a once living, albeit corpse-like, man had now turned to black holes. The aura that surrounds every human being was now gone. For all mankind cared, I was now a moving body, made simply to breath and think.

All of a sudden, a young man jumped in front of me, grabbing my hand. He shook it fiercely, smiling broadly.

"It's so good to see you up, sir. Finally, I must say. I thought I'd never see you out of bed!"

"You're the young man from the other night, aren't you?" He nodded excitedly.

"Anthony Hope, sir. I work maintaining the ropes here, and cleaning the decks if need be." I couldn't help but wonder if it was appropriate to sneer at the filthy floors. Anthony seemed to notice my thoughts, and blushed.

"It may not be the best of jobs, but you wouldn't believe how dirty some of the crewmates are here."

I nodded. For fifteen years, I had lived with men who I doubt bathed.

"And what is your name, sir? I didn't catch it."

"Sweeney Todd. Mr Todd." I emphasized the Mr. I wasn't going to be on first name terms. Anthony smile was even broader, if such a thing was possible, but soon he was called away by the captain. I was quite thankful. Again, my thoughts were my own, and I did not have to be forced to wear them on my sleeve.

My first day had already been spent, and I knew that we still had six left to go. Six days in which time I had learnt to dislike many of the crew members who talked of little but women and alcohol, and feel nothing towards the few who had done nothing aggravate me, such as young Anthony.

Ah, Anthony. How I pitied him. Often, he would be whistling a little tune to himself, or smiling, or talking of his times in London. From what I heard, it had treated him no better than I had, but he still smiled on past the fact that his parents were dead, and he had lived life as a street urchin. I almost wished he were as dead as me. It would be nice to have a companion who was not so naive.

Soon enough, the days had passed. I could see the borderlines of England nearing, and London was the dead on centre target for us. Mist was everywhere, and I could barely see where we were going. I stepped from the cabin where I had been sat for some time, and was welcomed by the sight of Anthony hanging over the edge of the boat, staring wide eyed at London. As I neared him, he was speaking to himself.

"I have sailed the world and seen its wonder, from the Dardanelles, to the mountains of Peru. But there's no place like London…"

"No, there's no place like London," I interrupted, my anger swelling again.

"Mr Todd?" I sighed.

"You are young. Life has been kind to you. You will learn…" Staring out at the familiar landscapes of London, memories came flooding back to me. I saw Benjamin's Barker's face again.

"I too have sailed the world and seen it's wonders, for the cruelty of men is as wondrous as Peru. But," I added with a sneer, "there's no place like London." Anthony was wary for the last little while of the journey. Once we left the ship and entered onto dry land, Anthony was not able to contain his curiosity.

"Is everything alright, Mr Todd?"

"I beg your indulgence, Anthony. In these streets there are…" I trailed off, looking about me. "Ghosts." I whispered the last word, knowing my insanity was almost completely visible.

"Ghosts?"

"Memories, as such."

Ah, yes. Such memories. Benjamin's face came back to mind.

"There was a barber and his wife…and she was beautiful."

Oh so beautiful.

"A foolish barber and his wife…she was his reason and his life. And she was beautiful."

Too beautiful.

"And she was virtuous."

Too virtuous.

"And he was…naïve."

Too undeniably so.

"There was another man who saw that she was beautiful. A pious vulture of the law, who with a gesture of his claw removed the barber from his plate."

Then there was nothing but to wait…

"And she would fall, so young, so soft, so lost and oh so beautiful." Anthony trembled slightly listening.

"And the lady, sir? Did she succumb?"

"Oh, that was many years ago." I shook my head. "I doubt if anyone would know."

I turned to Anthony, finally coming back to reality.

"I must thank you, Anthony. If you had not sounded the alarm, I would probably be dead now."

"It would be a very sad Christian indeed who could see you pitching and tossing in the waves like that and not tell anyone."

"And yet that is exactly what many a Christian would do." Anthony smiled, unaware of my seriousness.

"Will we meet again, my friend?"

"I daresay you can find me wandering around." I looked away from him, towards my distant target.

"In Fleet Street." I sensed that a hand was being held up in good will to me, but I ignored it, and moved on. For all I knew, that would be the last I saw of Anthony, but I should have thought it improbable. I kept my pace fast, not wanting to look back at my journey, but instead ahead at what I had to see.

London suddenly became a much bigger place. Although, in ten minutes, I had arrived. I looked darkly at the sign that stood above the door.

Mrs Lovett's Pie Shop.

Mrs? I could have sworn Albert would be dead by now. He wasn't in the best of shape. My eyes did not blink as I moved towards the shop, my heart calm and almost still. I opened the door, listening to the tinkling of the bell.

And there was Mrs Lovett, still as ghostly pale as ever, the bruises around her eyes more defined. She was hitting a pile of dough mercilessly with her rolling pin, and was almost unaware of me. Perhaps, I thought, I have the wrong building. She may have moved. If I simply retreated, I wouldn't even be noticed…

A gasp.

"A customer!"


End file.
